A Seedism & Seed Visual

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“the first rule to living an exceptional life is

to accept what you’re not.”

-the seed

Reality Cheque

Frustration and desperation were unfortunately starting to set in. Was failure soon to follow with its army of naysayers, well wishers when your life mirrors theirs, however, when you begin to step out and pursue greatness they seem to turn away from you or even worse, slam a hook into you and start to reel you back into a place where they can understand.

“I could have written a book if I didn’t have to work all day.” -

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Being consumed with the pursuit of new found passion can make 16 hour days appear to be the norm. They’re not, but still it is necessary in the early stages of the pursuit. It can be increasingly addictive, the pursuit that is, true greatness will only come if you can bash down the doors of insecurity and self doubt. A monumental task. Could it be insurmountable? Of course it could. If you are coward.

Questions start to creep in, they circle as if you are weak and it will only be a matter of time before you bow down and become their broken prey. What if your work, your passion, is not worthy of providing you with the necessary benefits of a sustainable existence? You find this thought slamming into you full force from the left.

Before you can process this query ‘bang’ from the right comes: What if the jury comes back and the verdict is negative? Fuck! I am down. I’m hurting. Stop. Please stop. Doubt is starting to win. It senses victory. Do you stop? Do you discount their voices? Or do you accept the conclusion of their deliberations and change course and retreat back to mediocrity? The problem is, that if it is truly your passion that you have discovered, it is not an option. You can’t retreat. Your only option is to discount those who are pestiferous. You must eliminate them from the equation.

However, reality has begun to set in, reality sometimes has a habit of masking itself as failure. The early verdict has come in, and though it is not a competition, this verdict indicates that your passion is an overwhelming success. You knew that already, finding away to accept it is the challenge. Your passion actually seems to be defying all boundaries. You even find yourself learning more about your penned words, from the opinions of others. This is humbling. If it is such a success, why are you living a life that is so impecunious? If it was not for the generosity of a few, you would have become meek and would likely be living in a box. You can’t allow that to be your sentence.

You’ve prepared a list of all of the places that you have approached over the last several months in an attempt to bridge the ever pressing financial responsibilities. The list depresses. One page - two pages - how can it be three pages in length? How can no one be interested? The list is an attempt to encourage a loosening of the purse strings of a potential source of funds. You realize during this exercise people are lame. Surely they can see the drive and determination that is written all over your face.

You have now waited over 45 minutes for your meeting. Time is running short. You have a meeting in 25 minutes with one of the establishments on the list and you have no option but to leave. The drive to this meeting would normally take 15 - 20 minutes, it has now taken 25 and you still have a ways to go. Your pride has already been swallowed, this really is not part of the plan. Yet it has to be, if you want to continue the pursuit of your dream. Living in a box is not a feasible option.

“Fuuucccck!” you scream as you slam your hand into the steering wheel.

These actions don’t remove any of the stress. You feel your blood begin to boil. You are rushing to a meeting that simply makes you ill at the thought of the work involved and due to situations out of your control you may miss the opportunity to perform this undesirable work. Ironic. Like the lack of interest in your list, this must be a sign. You must keep pushing forward.

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You leave the meeting. They seem to want you. Actually it is basically a cattle call, the work is menial, hire 50 slam them against the wall and see how many stick. The answer is usually 1. There is something beautiful about realizing this. This will only be a pit stop. If you proceed you can leave at any time, when your passion becomes more relevant. Sadness fills your heart as you realize others are not as fortunate as you. This is their reality. Hopefully their satisfaction is derived from elsewhere. What kind of life is it if you manage to survive 10 years of mind numbing work you will reach the highest level of pay. Twenty-two dollars an hour. Then you simply die. Unfortunately for most on this course, emotional death comes much earlier.

Once again your back at the office with your list. Forty more minutes of weaving in and out of traffic. Every second of this trek is taking you away from your real goal. This is not productive time. Your told that they can’t see you now, come back in 45 minutes. Another hurdle. For the first time you recognize how precious your time is. You rush home. More road construction - this is taking way too long. You are only home for a few moments, somehow you manage to send off 3 resumes in that time. This kind of pisses you off since you are being forced to jump over hurdles to prove you deserve funding.

Integrity fully intact you present your never ending efforts. If your efforts are declined, so be it. Of course they will not turn you down. Articulately you explain your situation, reveal the pursuits of the day. You do this with a calm confidence. Your request will not break their bank and will allow you to continue on the journey with a little of the pressure alleviated.

Declined you head to your bank, royalty cheque in hand from your first quarter as an author. Strangely you are not worried, it is just another obstacle that will make the eventual success a more interesting story. Funny, the rejection was because you were unable to prove that your cash flow was limited.

You get out of the car exactly one block away from the bank. The drive to the bank, well, more construction says it all. This day sucks.

After a couple of steps you notice a business card on the ground, it has fallen from your folder. You pick it up and as you do, out of the corner of your eye you catch something being tossed by the wind beneath the car. You think nothing of it and carry on. Half a block later you open your folder and to your dismay the cheque isn’t there, so you head on back to the car. Flipping thru every page you can’t find the cheque.

Under the seats - the glove box - everywhere. Damn-it!

Did you leave it at last meeting? You remember taking it out as part of your presentation.

Fuuuck! I am going to have to go back to the scene of the rejection. Another 20 or 30 more wasted minutes. I am meant to be promoting my efforts - my passion. ----

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You get down into a push up position and look under the car. Could the wind have deposited the cheque under the car? Is that what you saw? Two cars later and the results aren’t positive, you resign yourself to the fact that you will have to go back. Almost defeated, you decide that you still have to go to the bank.

Halfway there you cross the street which consists of 4 lanes. About 200 paces later you are at the banks door. You sense something brush against you leg.

You look down and flip - flip - flip - tumble - flip, like a leaf being thrown around helplessly by the breeze.

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Only it is not a leaf, you bend over to pick up the wind blown object. To your dismay and astonishment, it’s the cheque, your first Royalty Cheque, one corner was damp, it had apparently taken the time on its journey to take a brief dip in a puddle, but much like your journey of the day, complete with struggles and challenges, it stayed true to its pursuits and found a way to the final destination.

Clarity engulfs you, the few who have kept you fed and sheltered are the real jury. Their verdict is in and you can’t quit. You have a greater mission. It won’t be easy - nothing significant ever is. Your Royalty Cheque wasn’t a Royalty Cheque after-all - instead it symbolized something far greater - it had become a “Reality Cheque.”

It is now time for the journey to continue.

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3.5 cents of the listed price. No membership required.

I have been formulating this story for a long time now. IN MY HEAD! I have approached it from a vast variety of angles, however, up till today, Thursday April 28th 2005, I was not sure which angle was really the appropriate one to take. It then smacked me directly, full on, in the face. We may be screwed. I must clarify for a second. I hope not. I wish I was stupid. I may be. I’m probably not. I am not quite ready to dawn Sandwich Boards as fashion statement. But…..

You see gas prices have been sky rocketing threatening all aspects of our world. We are a fossil fueled, oil based world, everything about our lifestyles revolve around oil. Our food (both cooking and delivery), transportation, heating (vitally important in the northern climes) and our economic futures and quite frankly our survival as a species. Ironic as it may be the day after the pomp and pageantry involved in unveiling the new Airbus 380, seating available for over 880 or 4oo Americans, unless it has been in the works for a long time now our primary fuel source may be nearing the exhaustion level.

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Sure we use smoke & mirrors to try to discount the obvious, local news channels run stories about the exorbitant fuel prices.

Quite often they use sound bites of individuals older than sixty who shout out their anger, “The prices are ridiculous. I remember when…….”

The thing the media neglects is, the simple fact that these people also remember walking uphill to school thru 6 foot snow drifts, bare-footed, both ways.

In today’s age we even have websites dedicated to finding the cheapest gas prices available in a particular area. The problem with this is simple, dumb people visit these websites, hop into their SUV, travel and pollute and basically consume the same amount and in most cases even more fuel in their quest of savings. Rarely would a lawyer making over $100 per hour bother driving an extra 5o miles to fill their tanks. In my estimation these sites are only perpetuating the problem, encouraging more consumption and screwing the world even more.

The general sentiment is maybe the Oil Companies are gouging us. They are only concerned with massive profits. They likely are. I remember when I was in my twenties in the eighties hearing that the Oil Companies were crushing innovative inventions that allowed cars to get 50-70 and even over 100 miles per gallon. The public couldn’t know. Gas was cheap and making profits is the American way. The American Dream. Which leads us to ponder the following question: Is America a country or one large money making corporation?

Oh yeah - what smacked me in the face was this. Today again, April 28th 2005, while I was at home writing my memoirs, which in itself is funny to say, since I don’t think I am old enough to be memoir worthy. G. W. B was on as background music. I think he may have been preempting Oprah. F--g serious. I spoke of these two in a previous publication which I had a hand in writing, entitled, Seed’s Sketchy Relationship Theories - A Guide to the Perils of Dating (How not to become a bar regular).

I listened for a couple of minutes and G.W. mentioned the oil crisis facing America today. Not the world, but just America.

He said, “America is currently consuming oil at a rate where we are using 40% more oil than we are capable of producing.” he continued, “We are trying to find other sources (Middle East) and will do what can to ensure that we have an Oil Supply for the future.”

Hmm. G.W. is from Texas.

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This prompted more research on my part. I quickly went to the interior of my brain and came up with some thoughts on the matter. If G.W. is on national television talking about this, it must be serious. Smart Cars are popping up all over North America now. Much like the middle class is disappearing and you are either rich or working slaves. Are our roads soon to be sprinkled with either SUV’s or Smart Cars?

With a little more thought I concluded, the SUV may be the last citadel of vehicle luxury. They come equipped with just about every luxury imaginable. And if you want more luxury all you need to do is: “Pimp Your Ride.” In fact if you were to compare an SUV to that of the size of an Urban Condo and Apartment, there would not be much of a difference. Condo - 450 square feet. SUV - 425 square feet. Really, I actually measured. Then I realized the SUV is really the condo of the future. Once our fuel supply is exhausted, SUV communities will sprinkle the roadways of North America.

I hope were not too late. My gut tells me yes. My heart tells me yes. My brain tells me...... Nothing right now. I actually turned it off for a moment so that it won’t distract me while I am writing.

Now if some of the theories are correct and we have already passed “Peak Oil.” Peak Oil theorists state that our current levels of consumption cannot support our current population and unless drastic measures are taken to change our consumption patterns or population we don’t have much time left. Ten maybe twenty years max.

That’s ok, someone will fix it for us. They always do. I now suggest pulling your head out of the sand. Who? The oil of other parts of the world. The Middle East’s Oil. I have heard that other sources of energy are quickly being developed. Soy energy is being developed for instance. I just had a premonition, the powers that be think, Soy Energy would be a great way to power the Oil Drilling Rigs in Alaska.

Perhaps the oil of Alberta. They have a far - far - far - far to the right radical philosophies. The residents of the province of Alberta, actually are starting to believe that they discovered the Oil under their feet. There has even been a hint of a separatist movement brewing in the province. Keep pushing your selfish agenda Alberta and I am certain someone will come looking for your WMD.

Poutine certainly has taken a more serious tone with this story. Sorry about that. Remember it is just one perspective and is meant as food for thought. A couple of more things to ponder: 1. We are either close to out. 2. We have at least 1000 year supply left. Now my question to you is what is worse? If we are not almost out and we do have a 1000 year supply left: Why the fuck are the oil companies gouging us? And to carry it a step further: Why the fuck are we in Iraq?

Just think, if we are out and we have managed to exhaust the supply in less than 100 years and for instance the world population has increased by approximately 3 billion people since 1970 to 6.4 billion. Holy crap! Who wants to tell China who is just starting to get a taste of the North American thirst for consumption, “OF EVERYTHING,” that they can’t? Who? I am serious here, who? I know, I don’t want to?

Just imagine saying, “Hey China no Super Big Gulps for you.”

I almost forgot where I got the idea for this story from. One day I was filling up my small car that I rarely drive and I noticed the price on the pump was 3.5 cents less than the posted price. I thought I had just been lucky. The next day I noticed that the station I filled up at and the competitor across the street had additional new signs advertising savings of 3.5 cents off of the posted price. No memberships required. Hell, not only do we have to deal with the new excessively high prices. We have to look for a bloody sign to save a couple of cents. So to answer the question. Are the Oil Companies gouging us? Regardless of whether we are out of fuel or not the answer is:

YES.

In my estimation unless we make some radical changes we are DONE. However, in that spirit lets do something about it. Get out of your SUV and go for a walk. You do remember how to walk now: Don’t you?

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Excerpt from the soon to be released book Poutine.

Poutine is: A irreverent guide to day-to-day life and pop culture. Poutine is chalk full of wicked humor, amazing anecdotes, eye popping imagery. Ouch my eyes!!!, hard-hitting commentary and abstract random musings.

Seed's Life 31-45

We're baaacccckkk!!! Fan or fans whatever the case may be, we hope you missed us. We have been on a bit of a hiatus. A regrouping of sorts. We have experienced a lot of exciting new events over the last few weeks and some of those events took our attention away. We needed to focus our efforts on these new priorities. You see - two of our pending new book releases have been requested by well respected publishers. We will keep you posted on the progress. Due to these requests we have been scrambling to put together enough material to submit our efforts in an attempt to ensure the best possibility of publishing and literary success. We apologize to those of you that have tuned in and have been disappointed by the lack of new updates. We promise we will try to never let that happen again.

To start kick off our return here is another installment of:

Seed’s Life

(Points 41-45)

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1. I will never diminish another persons life experiences.
2. I was once at the same restaurant as the Tequila Restaurant (point 32), having lunch with 3 girls I know. My friend who bathed me showed up and pointed out to me that all 3 were included in the ____women total. I wonder if they knew?
3. Strippers are people too!!! Naked people, but, people nonetheless.
4. I sometimes worry about my teeth.
5. Now that I have found my passion, I work 12-14 hours a day. I better be good at what I am doing.

Check back in a week for points 46-50. By the way I highly recommend this exercise to each and every one of you, it may help you to unlock the doors to the future. See you again soon!!!

Check the archives for all previous posts.
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